An FOP's Account

Listeners to Gerry House's House Foundation morning show on 98WSIX in Nashville were excited to hear the morning of March 31st that Phil Valentine would be filling in for Gerry the next morning.  As eager FOPs tuned in they learned that Gerry was merely playing an April Fool's joke.  Gerry identified himself throughout the morning as Phil Valentime while his partner in crime, Mike Bohan, posed as Johnny P. 

Sightings of Phil Valentine have been less frequent than sightings of Elvis since he left the air to concentrate on his second book.  When he said he was leaving for a few months, he meant it.  He has scarcely been seen since December, spending a lot of time out of town, we understand, doing research.  But House's practical joke flushed Valentine out on April Fool's Day with an on-air call to his old friend, Gerry.

Valentine offered up his best impersonation of House in a good-natured jab then delicately tap-danced around some touchy questions about his future.  "We're probably breaking 15 different laws by just talking," House quipped.  He then asked Valentine when he was coming back.  Valentine hesitated then said, "Sometime in July.  I hope."  "Can you tell us where?" House inquired.  "Not really," he answered.  "Can you tell us what time of day you'll be on?"  "Not really," Valentine chuckled.  "Can you tell me this?" House pressed.  "Will you be doing mornings?"  Silence.  And then, "I wouldn't be foolish enough to go up against you, Gerry," Valentine responded.

Satisfied with the answer, House wished Valentine the best of luck and told him he was sorely missed.  "As long as you're not doing mornings, I'll definitely be tuned in no matter where you land," House offered.  With that Valentine slid back into the abyss.

Will he actually resurface in July?  Was he serious about not being on in the mornings or was he trying to throw everyone off the scent?  Only time will tell.  We'll be watching . . . and listening.